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1. Car alarms. Ever noticed how they just keep going? And there’s never anyone running toward them to catch the perp? They’re pretty much useless at this point, people.

2. Cars with automatic locks that beep when people lock them.

3.  People that drive through the parking lot with loud music on. There’s a sign on the gate that says “Loud Music Prohibited”. But apparently by “prohibited” the management means “entirely acceptable and unnoticed”.

4. Motorcycles. Especially Harley Davidsons.

5. Okay, pretty much all motorized vehicles.

6. Skateboards. And the kids who ride them. Yes. I am old. And crotchety.

7. Neighbors who let their door slam instead of closing it quietly. For some reason in these apartments the doors just whoosh shut right behind you. Why? I’d like to decide when to shut the door, thank you very much!

8. My cats scratching in their litter box. Enough already, dudes. We get it. You buried it.

9. The upstairs neighbors fighting at 3:30 am. Enough already, kids. We get it. You’re in your 20s.

10. The upstairs neighbors.. um.. “making up” at 4 am. Enough already, honey. We get it. You’re faking it.

11. The upstairs neighbors’ chihuahua. For real, what kind of ungodly noise is that?

12. The refrigerator. Has it always sounded like a rocket launching into space or is that the oh-crap-what-if-she-wakes-up paranoia kicking in?

Sorry about all the baby sleep posts lately. I’m kind of obsessed. But I guess it’s pretty much what all moms are obsessed with. You thought it was poop, didn’t you?

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