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I have a new motto: are we done yet? For reals. I am so done. I’m due in 5 weeks, but praying the baby shows up early. Technically 37 weeks is full term, so 2 weeks from now I’d like to be in the hospital delivering. I had a rough week. Monday I had an ultrasound appointment. My fluid was on the low end of normal, which I find odd because the last time I had an ultrasound it was on the high end of normal. Really? c’mon people. Figure your shit out. My husband was telling a woman he works with about it and she was like “omfg they did that to me the WHOLE time I was pregnant, your fluid is high, your fluid is low, blah blah blah” – that made me feel better, if not slightly annoyed with the whole monitoring process. The baby also wasn’t cooperating and wasn’t moving enough for them. I told them that she’s an evening/nighttime kicker, but did they care? Not so much. They hooked me up to the fetal monitor for 20 minutes and discovered that she’s fine. But, I have to go back weekly from now until the baby is born and be hooked up to monitors to make sure she is okay. Why? Because I’m over 35. Grrrr. Did I mention we only have 1 car? And that in order to take it I have to take my husband to work, which is roughly 45 minutes round trip. Then, the ultrasound joint  is in Henderson, again, 40 minutes round trip. And after my next doctor appointment I’ll be doing that every week too. That office is 20 minutes in the opposite direction. I’ll be in the car all damn day. And it’s 50 million degrees outside. And I’m large and pregnant and grumpy as shit. Sigh.

After the ultrasound I had a doctor appointment. More trauma at that office. Apparently I had ketones in my urine which can either mean that I haven’t eaten enough (obviously not the case), or that I’m dehydrated. I told her that it was probably the dehydration because of the whole fluid freak out at the ultrasound place. She got all uppity and was like “well you should be drinking a gallon of water a day.” Yeah, I know, and I normally do. Last weekend we traveled to visit my in-laws and spent time outside. I didn’t drink enough water. And was still dehydrated on Monday. GEEZ. So anyway, I’m done with the pregnancy. I want my life back. I want this little baby to be here so that nobody needs to monitor my goddamn body every week anymore.

Also this week I finally am experiencing the breathlessness that I’ve been reading about. Apparently it happens to a lot of people in the third trimester, but so far I’ve been lucky. Then, just a couple of days ago I was suddenly like “geez, I can’t catch my breath” and I’ve been panting ever since. It’s ridiculous. And my pelvis is still killing me. Plus I’m peeing every 25 minutes what with drinking a gallon of water a day, and my insomnia is back. I was up at 2 in the damn morning today. Why? Oh just to panic about being a mom and wonder what I was thinking by getting pregnant. Geesh. Sorry if it sounds like I’ve become complainy complainerstein – I have, but I’m uncomfortable and grumpy and want to scream. Hey baby, COME OUT NOW.